Spring Change

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I have to start out with just putting it on out there. My poor husband, he will forever be stuck in the middle of my “mid-life crisis'” and my self exploration into my adult identity. I’ll tell you a little about myself first. I am 29(or if you want the honest truth I’m on my 4th anniversary of my 29th bday), I am married, and I have 3 children. I think most people would say normal until you hear their ages. Ten, two, and 11 months. Yep that’s right I had my oldest at the ripe old age of 23 years old.

As a young single mom I knew who I was. Having attended

cosmetology school at 20 and then going back to school to become an Esthetician, I knew who I was inside and out. I had many life experiences at a young age that showed me who I was. Fast forward seven years to 2014, being 31, getting married, and having my second daughter! I couldn’t be more excited. This was the first time I was able to slow down and stay home and enjoy my baby and being a mom. Then 2016 came and so did my first son and my last child. Boom 16 months apart. Life didn’t slow down, it sped up like the tilt o whirl at the fair and all of a sudden it stopped. All of a sudden I look up and everything is different including myself.

Today is the spring Equinox, spring brings in change and new life. Today has been somewhat symbolic in my life. I found myself making my usual hair appointment today. I mean my roots, come on, they need help. As I’m looking at photos online to find inspiration for my spring color I can’t help  but be drawn to these beautiful colors of peach, pink, and lavender. So naturally the first thing I do is text these pics to my stylist, then my best friend, then my husband. Of course as women we seek approval from the ones closest to us. If I do it will it embarrass my daughter, will my husband still find me attractive, will the other moms think I’m even more nuts than they already do?

The other moms. This is a subject that has always given me anxiety. Having had my daughter at 23 years old, by the time my daughter started school I realized all the other moms were at least 10 years older than me. We didn’t exactly have that much in common, I mean I still roll around town dancing in my SUV blasting Britney Spears and Lady Gaga. Needless to say I’ve seen many strange looks from the other moms already. It’s like always feeling like your judgmental older sister is always watching you. Thank goodness my real older sister has never been like that..I’d die.

So this leads me to my ultimate issue. Is it me? Is it appropriate? I mean I don’t work a professional office job so no dress code here. I’m a 33-year-old mom though with 3 kids. Eight years ago when I was a 25-year-old single mom, no doubt. I would do it in a heartbeat it’s who I was and I knew that, I still do. Is that still me though. I mean would I love to be Barbie again? Absolutely! Who wouldn’t?! But is that realistic to what is my new adult reality now that the last few years on the tilt o whirl has stopped?

Thus is the search and journey into my new adult reality. I may be standing here questioning who I am these days, but I can still see that super fun vivacious single young mom I once was. So I think for now, the #unicornmom in me has won!

*I will update with photos when I get my hair done.

Pics of my Inspiration

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